Dad's (Allyn's) Letter

My dearest Emily,

 

I can’t imagine life without you – what a cliché but never – never – more true.  Somehow God has provided the right balance by using all of us to celebrate your 15^th milestone special celebration of life.   What an incredible tapestry of lives and emotions that continues to grow and draw others in.  Yours is an incredible story with chapters yet to be written that I pray you will never tire of reaching for or retelling to others.

It is good to reflect back, to remember the journey.  Your anniversary celebration does that for me, so this is some of what I recall.  To sit by and helplessly watch the life being drained from you was nearly unbearable.  For me to find peace with the decision to totally and completely give you up into God’s hands – so that your treatment and care could make you a miracle – was perhaps the hardest thing I have ever done.  Others would say I had no choice – when you are at the end of the road with no where else to turn – but I know in my heart this is not so.  Your road to survival has been littered with so many seemingly insurmountable obstacles that a normal person like myself would hardly get past one let alone the nearly countless ones you have endured.

 

During the very first hours of this journey – turned into days – then long agonizing months – and now years – I marvel at your resilience and willingness to push on.  Even as one door closes, you are already reaching for another.  Is this easy to do?  Never – I see the daily burden you carry.  I know you must reach inside yourself to find that little something special to give you the strength and desire to push on. 

 

It seems the battles – whether big or little – are always uphill struggles.  Everyone gets tired and wants to quit, but you understand that by doing so will rob you of the reward – the unimpeded rush of exhilaration and thrills of the no care in the world downhill ride.  Rewards take all sorts of shapes and sizes – from “do-over” trips to exotic locals to a Starbucks coffee on a cool fall day – to searching for the great pumpkin or being nuzzled by your puppy – to sitting in the company of people you love and sharing life’s stories and giggles.

You have learned that character is built only on the uphill and that the downhill rewards are often short fleeting moments that are only temporary lapses from daily reality.  But it is character and these rewards that help refuel and add to that little something special deep inside us.  I believe we have learned to cherish these special treasures – no matter how small – so that we can draw on them to help us over the next daunting obstacle.  Please know that you have provided me treasures galore along this life’s journey.

 

I believe we all learned together how to find faith, hope, joy and love in even our darkest moments – that is what glad to be alive means to me.  And I use these lessons everyday thanks to you.  Happy Glad to Be Alive Day Emily - not just on this special 15^th anniversary day – but each and every day I get to see you!

 

Love  Dad